“You are Megan.” These are the words coined by the pharmacist who purchased my 300 pound elliptical years ago after I loaded it onto my brother’s truck in the pouring rain under a tarp, transported it across the city, unloaded it and set it up in his garage. It squeaked a little after getting a tiny bit wet and he tried to get me to lower the price. “No way,” I said. He tried to refuse buying it- “No, you’re buying this machine.” We locked eyes for several long seconds, he smiled slightly, sighed loudly and shaking his head said, “You are Megan.” It’s a phrase my husband repeats when I show my stubborn, determined or pigheaded side. “You are Megan.” Yes, I am.
I am a woman. I have risen up from disempowerment at the hands of society and men. Begrudgingly, I must give some of the credit for my empowerment to a man- my husband Benito. We met while both attending University as older students with the goal of beginning a new career. I had just burnt out from my work at a non-profit and Ben was recreating himself. I had always been a B student. No one had ever told me that I had anything else in me… until Ben. Ben was an A+ student. He is brilliant and humble. He worked hard for his grades, like really hard. Ben spent weeks pouring over research for a 5 page paper, collecting every thought others’ have had on a topic to formulate his own thoughts, enabling him to write something that was his own. Ben taught me how to study, research, write and think critically. He modelled the work it took to empower yourself- cause you can count on NO ONE BUT YOURSELF to empower you! People will always disappoint us (a Ben quote).
Forgive my rabbit trail; where was I? I went from being a burnt out, lost, unsure, negative, unmotivated woman who just wanted a modest career that would pay the bills if I stayed single until I died… to a confident, tenacious, assertive, Masters educated trailblazer who has set her sights on changing the world. I am a professional. I am a social worker. I am a therapist. I am a mental health clinician. I am a critical thinker. I am a wife. I am a soon-to-be mom. I am a daughter and sister. I am a friend. I am a journeyer. I am Megan.
I don’t know what this blog will be like for you, the reader. But for me? This blog is a test of my confidence, determination, critical thinking skills, resiliency, creativity, open-mindedness, values, ideas and continued growth. My aim is to challenge myself to empathize deeply, to be embarrasingly honest, to allow myself to be uncertain, to lean into pain and joy, to laugh at myself and to accept constructive criticism that enables me to grow and learn.
If you are on a similar journey, join me.